The best writing process

  1. Type up 500 words of pure free associations.  Don’t hold back!
  2. Write a draft of an idea in a notebook with a ball point pen.
  3. Visit Aldous Huxley’s grave in Watts Cemetery Chapel, Compton, UK.
  4. Read out loud what you’ve written so far. Record it in your phone.
  5. Go for a long drive. 4 – 5 hours minimum.  What music to play?    Just re-play on a loop  any bitter arguments you’ve had from the past 6 months.  You might forget about the article during this time.  That’s okay!
  6. After the drive, write a second draft, only this time, write it long hand with a quill. Be sure to use Norwegian swan feather.  Don’t be cheap – your future as a writer is at stake!
  7. After the ink dries (4 – 5 hours) , throw out everything –laptop, notebooks, pens, quills.. and just say forget it, I give up – I’m not a writer. It’s over.  Make a big stink about it.  Call everyone you know (and that I know) and tell them.  The more dramatic the better.  If you can cry on command, now is the time.
  8. Wait 4 – 5 minutes. Triumphantly change your mind and decide, for just one more post.. “I will be a writer”.  Order a fresh new laptop.  When that arrives in the mail, just type up something dumb and post it.

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