Mary had a little lamb, but that was years ago… before the 40 years war. Now, she looked back on those days fondly. She wondered futilely why her mother, the famed artificial intelligence scientist Dr. Piper Wareheim, had ever thought to train geese to steal. (Once geese were trained to steal, mass chaos erupted, triggering … Continue reading Before the war
Buck Chupson was thought to be lost at sea. Search parties had been deployed, but 24 hrs later, he was nowhere to be found. The local authorities made a statement and answered press questions: “After a rigorous investigation, we have concluded that Buck Chupson is on land.” The Sheriff stated. After this, the crowd exhaled … Continue reading Buck Chupson, lost at sea
Dear Chris, Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do good things happen to bad people? Why do small things happen to big people? Why do hot things happen to cold people? Why do "dank" things happen to "narc" people? -Conrad, 19, Orlando, FL, USA Hey Conrad, thanks for the questions. In philosophy, … Continue reading Answering reader mail – part… 10? I’ve lost count.
A man named Ace read the tale of Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand to his young son, Richard. After Richard fell asleep, Ace tripped over Richard’s Dagny Taggart action figures and fell down a flight of stairs, sustaining a serious head injury. When Ace awoke at the bottom of the stairs, he had a strange … Continue reading Classic Ace
We see a large, open field (somewhere in northern Virginia) with thousands of subway cars in neat lines. Millions of recruits, all dressed in subway conductor uniforms (a lighter blue since they are still in training) run drills within these train cars. They alternate between the roles of conductor and passenger-holding-the-door-open. Similar scenes loop over … Continue reading Subway Conductor Training Academy
Starting tomorrow, I’ve decided to post 7 photos every 7 minutes for the next 7 months. The photos must all be group photos, and must be posted along with 7 7-page essays. Each 7-page essay will include a description of each photo + 7 ways the photo could have been improved + a character assessment … Continue reading 7 photo challenge (a variation)