A father and son sat by a fire, smoking cigars. The father spoke first.
“I talked to my boss today. He made some calls, pulled a few strings. You’ll be driving your first MTA bus on Monday, son.”
“Yea, dad – about that. I’m not sure I’m cut out to drive MTA buses. I’ve really always wanted to… be… a subway conductor.” He shifted uneasily in his seat. The father was trying hard to stifle his rage.
“You come from a long line of MTA bus drivers. No son of mine is going to be a… a… a subway conductor!” The father picked up a branch and snapped it in two.
“…I took the entrance exam. I was accepted to subway conductor training academy. If it doesn’t work out, I can always fall back on driving MTA buses. But I need to pursue my dream while I’m young. If I don’t, I’ll regret it forever.”
“Get the hell out of my house, Lucas.”
Lucas walked toward the front door to leave. His friend Todd was trying to enter the house while Lucas was leaving it. Lucas took 2 steps back.
“Please, Todd, stand aside, and let the person getting OUT of the house exit first.”, Lucas said between sobs.
Meanwhile, Lucas’s father went up to Lucas’s room, punched every wall in the room, and tore down all the posters of famous subway conductors from the walls. He suddenly realized his son’s passion for subway conducting was genuine, so he ran outside to try to catch him before he left.
“Son, stop – I’m sorry! I just want what’s best for you!” he shouted across the front lawn. Lucas didn’t turn back. He kept marching and said,
“Dad, the ‘Forgiveness’ train.. is.. not running. For alternate service, take the ‘Go Fuck Yourself’ and transfer to the ‘You’re the worst’!